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How to stop living from a place of urgency.

What moves you to take action? What triggers you to follow a dream? What helps you achieve your goals?

Getting inspired to take action towards a big goal or dream can show up in many different ways.

For me, it was at a conference I was attending. The presentation had just finished, and everyone was rising out of their seats ready to head out the door to satisfy their growling stomachs. This was one of those annual strategy deployment conferences where leaders come together to talk about the upcoming year, goals, new initiatives, and planning. I was there as I was coaching most of the leaders in the room.

Then in an instant everything changed.

My mouth dropped open and my heart sank when I heard the company head say: “We need people who are hungry and who hustle, and we need to get rid of the fu*king rest.”  I couldn’t believe what I was hearing and to boot that he was saying this out loud to the eight other leaders surrounding him as they funneled out of the conference room.

I knew this was a highly competitive environment. The pressure to perform, meet expectations, and claim rank, was fierce.

All to well, I knew what it was like to live by this sword. The reward not worthy of its consequences.

This was the catalyst I needed to follow-through and to put out an alternative. Another way, a better way. This was the impetus for my book Sell From Love.

Sell from love offers you a better way to sell, work, and live.

Everyone is selling something. Whether it’s getting your kid to eat their greens, your spouse to say yes to a dream vacation, your boss to give you a raise, or a client to buy your services. You are in some way seeking to sell, persuade, or influence someone to do something.

Often, we get stuck in fear. Fear if they don’t agree, don’t say yes, reject our request or worse us. This fear creates a tornado effect in our lives and leadership. Often having us go unconscious without even realizing fear has taken over and is affecting how we show up. It’s not till life is not working that we hear the wake-up call and seek an alternative.

What I appreciate about the Sell from Love approach is that it will teach you how to love yourself. So many of us are stricken with the curse of punishing ourselves with unsupportive and negative chatter in our heads. We’re our own worst critics – right? Imagine what your life, work, and leadership would be like if you spoke to yourself as you would to your best friend? How would this helpful voice move you forward and learn to relinquish the shackles that your inner critic holds you back from living your best life?

Often, when we’re trying to sell or influence someone to do something, we get stuck on focusing on what we’ll get out of it or what we might lose if they don’t say yes. This could be tangible things like a car, vacation, or money. More often it’s subtle like status, confidence, or success. We get mired in what we’ll get out of it that we lose our way and forget what they, the person, you are looking to influence will receive. For instance:

  • Your kid will get a healthy body over you exercising your parental responsibilities.
  • Your spouse will get reprieve from their stressful job over you getting some fun in the sun.
  • Your boss will get an uber engaged and productive employee over the extra money you’ll earn to get a new car.
  • Your client will get a new strategy to help them improve client loyalty over you hitting your revenue goals.

When you sell from love you will not lose your way, by trying to get your way.

Selling from love, isn’t about you not getting what you want, rather letting go of the fear and worry that if you put your attention on others that you will lose or miss out in some way.

When you focus on what others receive, everyone including you wins. It’s a much better way to play.

One thing I know for sure is this: Fear reacts. Love Responds.

When your thoughts, feelings and actions are motivated from fear, life is pressure filled, urgent and concerned with what you will get or miss out on.

When your thoughts, feelings, and actions are motivated from love, life is fulfilling, you are whole and enough, and there is always plenty to go around, so you’ll never be shorted or not have enough.

Fear will have you believe you need to know, be in control, and to make something happen, even with force.

Living and leading from a place of love, you trust that even in the unknown and uncertain, you have confidence and peace of mind that everything will work out perfectly, if you only allow it to happen.

Now over to you. 

  • What happens to you when you think and take action from fear?
  • What happens to you when you think and take action from love?

I’d love to hear from you!  Please do send me your insights, comments about this post and any question that is top of mind for you. Email me at:

With love,


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Sell From Love Academy

For Coaches, Consultants and Advisors.

A new way to sell with ease, grace and integrity for a profitable business you and your clients will love.

Identify your Sales Gap

Are you selling from love or fear?
Identify your Sales Gap.


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Module 07Design a Marketing Strategy that Feels Good

The goal of this module is to make your Brilliant Difference and Most Important Thing Offer – VISIBLE.

There’s a saying, build it and they will come. We wish that it worked this way, rather fear does; because then we wouldn’t have to put our selves out there, up for judgement and rejection. Sharing your work, your services and expertise can be scary. But when we come from a place of love, as author Susan Jeffers says we “feel the fear and do it anyway.”

That is how we sell from love. We acknowledge fears presence and at the same time we take action that is aligned to our deepest desire and highest potential and possibility.

In this module we talk about the journey of making you and your offer visible to your clients and the milestones along the way, that will ultimately get you both to a place of saying YES, to working with each other.

Visibility is an option you decide on. My hope after this module is that you make a decision to be visible, in a way that feels good to you and is on the edge of your comfort zone. We need more of you, your Brilliant Difference and your work out in the world. Let’s help your ideal clients find you by showing them where you are.

In this Module you will:

Module 06Craft a Compelling Offer

The goal of this module is to clarify and confirm your most important thing – your offer.  In essence, it is what are you selling that you will use to serve your clients with and help facilitate the transformations they are seeking.

There are two important parts of the offer conversation we need to highlight here –

  • What are you offering to your clients – what are they getting?
  • What your clients are offering to you – what you are receiving for extending that offer?

Fear as a tendency to get in the way when we get to this part of the selling process.  But, not anymore, because you’re seeing that your offer is not about you, it’s about your clients and what they will get as a result of working with you.

In this Module you will:

Module 05Define Your Clients’ Transaction to Transformation Story

The goal of this module is to help you identify what is really happening when you sell. There’s the thing you are selling, and then there’s the thing your client is buying. What are the differences? And how do you not let selling from fear interfere and water down your transformation to a transaction.

At every stage of selling, fear has an opportunity to enter, this is even more prevalent when we are engaging and enrolling a client into our offers. This module is all about getting you aligned to what you are really selling – a transformation and giving you the tools to communicate that to your clients. This way you and your client are on the same page with what you are selling and what they are buying.

In this Module you will:

Module 04Discover Your Essential Client Conversation Skills

The goal of this module is to help you learn and understand how to create an environment that facilitates trust, connection, and confidence with your clients.  You play a critical role in making this happen for yourself and your clients, so fear does not get in the way of your intentions and impact.  In this module you’ll learn how to create a safe space for your clients that help them choose you as their trusted adviser.  You’ll also walk away with the most important conversation skills you need to that will help you do that.

In this Module you will:

Module 03Use Love as a Sales Strategy

The goal of this module is to help you move from your comfort zone and into your courage zone with love. Selling is filled with opportunities for fear to poke its head up inevitably holding you back from sharing your work and making the impact you know you are here to make. This is why we need to acknowledge that fear will be there, especially in times when you’re doing something you’ve never done before or reaching for goals you’ve never set out to accomplish before. This module is all about equipping you with the right tools to move forward with confidence, elegance, and ease.

In this Module you will:

Module 02Claim Your Brilliant Difference

The goal of this module is to help you discover and name your Brilliant Difference. This uniqueness you bring is here to add value and make change in the world. It’s here to make the word a better place. Focusing on who you are and finding the words to articulate your Brilliant Difference is fundamental to loving yourself, the first pillar to sell from love.
In this Module you will:

Module 01Unlock the Power of Love

The goal of this module is to increase awareness of when you are selling from love vs. fear and how embracing a new definition of selling will help you move closer to love.  Plus, you’ll learn all about how to manage the fears you face every time you market yourself and your business, make offers to sell your products and services, start on a new project or business idea.

In this Module you will: