How to have more confidence is one of the most asked questions I get from participants in our sales training programs and workshops. In client verbatims it often shows up like this:
“How do I sell courageously?”
“How can I speak without reservation?”
“How do I deal with feelings of rejection?”
“How can I bring my authentic self?”
“How can I close without hesitation?”
Fear of rejection, uncertainty of an outcome, and doubting if your ideas or perspectives will be well received impair your ability to be naturally confident.
Your natural state of confidence looks different than mine, and it looks different than your colleagues. The problem is we often get stuck in comparing ourselves with others, wishing and hoping that one day we could be as confident as they are. You look at those outgoing, charismatic, got the gift of the gab traits, and wonder how you could be more like that. You tell yourself if you could just figure out how to be more approachable and less restrained, then you’d definitely be more self-assured, attract more clients and opportunities.
But what if the route to confidence is not about you being more like them and instead more like you? What if, the magic confidence code was already pre-programmed in you, and all you needed to do was be yourself. Look at any happy, successful, and fulfilled individual, and they will tell you that one of the biggest contributors to their success, was their ability to be authentic.
I believe that the quality of your life and the impact of your work rest explicitly on how comfortable you are in your own skin and how willing you are to be seen in it. If you want unshakable confidence, relentless courage, and to have an invaluable impact, here are 3 things you can do to move forward:
- Discover your Brilliant Difference™
Your Brilliant Difference™ is a compilation of your strengths, expertise, and experiences. It’s what makes you special, different, and it’s your unique way of adding value to your clients’ life and business and making a meaningful difference in your work. However, most people don’t spend anytime comprehending what they bring to the table and why it matters to their employers and clients. This is not a nice to have, or egotistical activity. Your Brilliant Difference is what will differentiate you in the marketplace, give you innate confidence, but more importantly connect your work and leadership to your life’s purpose.
In our programs we teach a 3-step process on crafting your Brilliant Difference Signature, Statement, and Story. Each of these forms giving you depth and providing you a wholistic picture not only your value, but why it’s in the best interest of your clients to choose you.
You’re not here to sell stuff, be it a mortgage, investment solution, or consulting package. You get to use the products and services you are selling as a venue to actualize on your greatness. Expressing this greatness through your Brilliant Difference is what will not only give your work and life more meaning, but it will also help you get more clients, build stronger relationships, and grow your business. Invest the time to reap the benefits of identifying your Brilliant Difference.
- Tune into the right frequency
When selling a product or service you have two objectives. First, it’s to serve your client and meet their needs. Secondly, it’s to hit your sales targets and revenue goals. This reminds me of a Confucius saying, “The man who chases two rabbits, catches neither.” When you have two or more goals, it makes things messy. You lose site of what, or rather who is most important. Your attention is divided.
Let’s make things easier and give you one goal. The only target you have is to serve your clients and meet their needs. If and when you do that, the consequence is a sale. The objective is not to get the sale, that is the inevitable outcome from the quality of your listening, understanding, and ability to present the best solutions available to solve your clients’ problems. When you get that right, your clients reward you with their business, giving you a sale.
But it’s hard to remember that especially when you’re behind on your quota. One of the tools we teach in our Transformational Selling™ program is learning to turn the dial. Everyone, including you are tuned into their favorite radio station – WIIFM, also known as, ‘What’s in it for me?’ You’re so focused on what you’re going to get (a sale), that you forget the reason you’re doing it in the first place.
Next time you find yourself worried about what people may think, nervous about a proposal presentation, or pining to close a deal, do this:
- Write a WIIFM list: Make a list of all that you’re getting out of the deal. Be selfish and call out everything you will get if you close this client. No one will see your list, so be honest. Write down things like, a bonus, recognition, positive accolades from your boss, feeling successful and fulfilled. It’s important that you make conscious your WIIFM list, so there’s no hidden intent or agenda. You come clean with what you will attain as a result.
- Write a WIIFT list: Now you’ll write a, ‘What’s in it for them?’ list. This is a list of all the things your clients will receive because they chose to work with you. They’ll have more time, more money, less stress, less costs, or peace of mind. This list reconnects you to why you’re doing this work and who it’s for. It balances out your intentions and reminds you that your products and services are here to serve your clients, not only your bottom line.
- Change the narrative
Several years ago, I landed an uber ideal client. They had signed on for a three-month pilot program that they would commit to expanding to their national leadership team if it delivered intended results. It was exciting and at the same time a lot was at stake to secure this huge opportunity.
I don’t know about you, but I have an ambitious, type A, strive for excellence bend to me. These are fantastic qualities, until they get mired in fear and doubt that then contort themselves into one big competitive, tense, perfectionist knot. The pressure to meet expectations or rather the fear of not nailing them, has me care too much about what others will think or over-stressing if the outcomes promised will be achieved. Instead of focusing on doing the work, we worry about how the work will be perceived.
To navigate through this tangle, I have a mantra for you, “Care so much, you don’t care”. Care so much about the work, the impact, the client, the service you are delivering, that you don’t care about what people will think of you. Repeat this over and over again, ‘I care so much (about the work), that I don’t care (what you think of me).”
You stop making your work, results, and service personal. You don’t take it as a claim of your worth, value, and identity. You grant yourself unlimited possibility and potential. You give your work the freedom and space it needs to be what it was intended to be, without the intervention of your fear-based controlling self.
As you look at your sales goals for this coming year, choose one of these strategies to help you increase your confidence to grow your business:
- Discover your Brilliant Difference
- Tune into the right frequency
- Change your narrative
Now it’s over to you, which one resonates with you most? Which one are you going to implement?
If you’d like to learn more about our programs and how you can retain and grow your business, deepen client relationships, and sell with integrity visit us here or connect with Finka at: finka@finkainc.com
